Rupert on Rupert | Kustom Kommune | The Carlton | the Grace Darling | the Shaw Davey Slum
How do you know you’re getting old? Probably when you go to a bar, and the
people you're out drinking with are at least twenty years younger than you…
and they’re all there legally.
Which is not necessarily a bad thing (i.e.
you out drinking with youngies).
First up, they’ll be fitter and almost universally better looking than
your usual cohort, they’ve yet to be ground down by the heel of bitter
experience, and are prone to more outrageously entertaining behaviour than your
more mature colleagues.
That said, I’ve been to a few bars lately
as an older “tourist”, visiting the gathering pools of the hip and young(er)
punters. Here’s a couple of tips
of where to go should you be craving younger companionship:
Rupert on Rupert
73 Rupert St. Collingwood
This bar opened in the last six months, and
do you know for the life of me, I've walked past it almost twice a day every day since its opened and
never knew it was there. Not only
is there no signage outside, but the street itself is missing a street sign
(how very Melbourne).
This bar was full of "the lovely" on Saturday
night, despite the inclement weather.
The bar design seems to be by the same people who did the pub in St Kilda
CJ used to work at… um... the Newmarket.
Kustom Kommune
25 Easey St, Collingwood VIC 3066
This place is a custom motorcycle workshop,
that turns into a Texan BBQ joint, bar and band venue. You certainly wouldn’t want to smoke
inside (even though you’re not allowed to), since the place might blow up with
the fumes of petrol and oil.
I arrived at this bar to see a friend’s band (Fizz's band the ohms),
and on arriving was surrounded by hipsters with beards (“oh brother”). But it was when I heard someone say
“God, I’m nearly twenty five”, that I did a double take.
I see this is (yet another) “pop up”, so
you only have another few weeks to get down and try some slow cooked pork…
The Carlton
193 Bourke Street
Melbourne VIC 3000
With its stuffed giraffe head on the first
floor (balcony bar here), and fake elephant head on the third (with rear bar
balcony), this place has become a Melbourne Institution, a taxidermist’s wet dream, and a groovy place to
drink. I had a very nice time here
recently, and note that on the fourth or fifth floor, which used to be bedrooms
along a corridor back when it must have been a more normal pub/hotel, there are
now different themed mini-discos in each bedroom fitting about ten people each,
with their own music and mini-bars in each (called the “Bar-Dream”, another pop
up concept…).
Big ticks, but long
queues to get in at the ground floor during peak times.
The Grace Darling Hotel
114 Smith Street, Collingwood, Victoria
Australia, 3066
Nothing says young people like cheap beer,
and this venue has three dollar pots and six dollar pints of Coopers from 4
till 7 weekdays. Plus it’s one of
the nicer pubs in Collingwood, and the original founding spot of the
Collingwood Football club, so there.
I believe they also have bands and DJs.
And while I’m on the point of “cheapskate
emergency venues”, you might also try…
The Shaw Davey Slum
171-175 Elgin Street
Carlton VIC 3053
OK, this is NOT fine dining. This place targets students (the
College variety, from up the road), with super cheap beer ($2 pots) and food
($8 parmas and steaks), but if you can extend the extra few dollars for the "next level of meal and drink up", it’s good
value and they play I Dream Of Genie and Get Smart on the TVs within.
If I was a teenager and going on a date
with a girl and my pocket money, I’d take her here and say “have anything you
like”, perhaps even getting her a cocktail or two. Just watch the rugby jumper wearers at exam knock off
drinks.
Got any tips on where the young and the
beautiful grace their forms?
Why not drop us a line? (see comments section below)
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